I Know What We Could Do With All Those Shoes

shoes2Florida authorities are wondering what to do with thousands of shoes that were accidentally dumped from a truck on the southbound lanes of the Palmetto highway in Miami yesterday, creating a mess that blocked traffic. City workers with brooms and “Road Rangers,” who come to the aid of stranded motorists, tried their best to clear a quarter-mile section of expressway littered by the used shoes. Eventually, officials had to hire a private contractor to bring in a front-end loader. Now, they have all these shoes and are looking for a charity that might want them. I have a better idea.

They should distribute the shoes to citizens who would like to pay a fitting tribute to President George W. Bush as he leaves office at 11.59 a.m. on Jan. 20. In Jamaica, they would “beat ol’ pan and grater ol’ grater” behind him. Here, they should follow the example of that Iraqi reporter and throw shoes.